• Twenty four years of examinations, Alhamdolillah, & I am done now.
  • It’s about time to step into the new phase of my life.
  • I am prepared and I am satisfied; I am blessed by all means, Alhamdolillah.
  • I just can’t stop thanking Allah SWT for everything that has been happening around me, with me, for me.

But, there’s always something that keeps me from being ‘absolute’ happy.. I don’t feel like home anywhere. I get suggestions to visit the parents back home, but I am sure that it’s going to add more weight to this melancholy (I wished never to use this word). There are few thing I can talk about though.

I do not ‘party’. Not that I don’t want to, but I just don’t want to damage my Imaan by becoming a part of some celebration that goes beyond the limits set by Allah SWT for Muslims. Now when I do this, I make a whole bunch of people angry at me. And, the situation turns worst when I try to justify the cause of my decisions. Then, I also try my level best to stay away from movies and music. Not that it’s all not attractive to me, but because I don’t want to witness the kissing scenes in transformers2 with no shame and pretend that I didn’t see it. I am a man and I am not kid enough to shade my eyes when 18+ stuff happens. So, I have two options: either I enjoy my Isha prayer; or, I feel the guilt while praying it at 1:00 am because I went to theater and then wasted some time in talking rubbish at starbucks. And finally, I put a period on all discussions that lead to obscenity. So, I lost the ‘fun’ part of my old friends, I lost my friends.

So, I am alone, perhaps by purpose. If good comes, I’ll take it. For all else, I hold up on myself. I’ll force myself to hate that which is not in compliance with The Instruction Set.  I’ll prefer the patience over the useless laugh-out-louds. I’ll wait, Inshallah :>

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